


I Heard He Makes You Happy

by vexatiouseforcause



Category: The 100
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Breakup Fic, Cheating, F/F, Kinda happy-ish ending, Musician Lexa, Roan is in this for like two secs, They're pretty much always drunk, anya just wants them to get their shit together, lexa is a bit of an asshole
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-23
Updated: 2017-03-23
Packaged: 2018-10-09 14:21:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10414113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vexatiouseforcause/pseuds/vexatiouseforcause
Summary: Inspired by Ed Sheeran's "New Man"Not for the first time Lexa wonders how they got here.“I may be a bitch but I'm not a cheater. You want to fix this? You want a quick fuck? You want to grab a drink and talk it out? Call me when you leave him.”





	

**Author's Note:**

> I got this stuck in my head and spent all night writing it, hopefully it's not horrible.
> 
> Let me know what you think! It's much appreciated. Enjoy.

They're hungover and laying around waiting for Lincoln to show up, Lexa is strumming a random melody in sweatpants and glasses. Anya snaps a picture for the new album prep announcement on instagram. Lexa will probably kill her for it but she enjoys watching the fan girls lose their minds over pretty eyes and tattoos and the soulful rocker vibe Lexa has. 

“You're gonna play the new song at tonight's show?” Anya mumbles breaking the silence. 

Anya wants to feel bad about pushing lexa to play it. She really does. She just really doesn't. Anya is sick of ballads. Absolutely sick of playing songs that wax poetic about Clarke freaking Griffin. And it's good. Really good. So she'll take a trash talking pop ballad about Clarke’s new boyfriend. 

“I don't know, it was just for fun” 

Anya could not care less about the blond princesses feelings. And she especially doesn't care about asshole mcasshole feelings who in reality has no business dating a 24 year old he's gotta be at least nearing 40. 

“It's good and I think you should put it on the record.” 

Lexa makes a non committal sound. 

“Just play it tonight and if it goes well we'll put in on the record. You have to admit it's got a great sound.” 

Anya swears she wants to feel bad, but she needs to shake Lexa up a bit. Lexa loved the spoiled brat and it was her job to make sure her baby sister was happy. Admittedly the blond wasn't a spoilt brat when she’d been dating Lexa. She's been sweet, a caring girl with a wild side who could drink you under the table and spend a day in the park buried in a book. These days the blond is all over instagram half naked running around with a gym rat eating kale. 

But the thing is it's hilarious, and a damn good song. 

“Yeah alright we can play it near the end of the set” lexa says with a sigh “I don't know about putting it on the record though” 

So Lexa had no idea that Clarke was going to be at the show tonight, raven had mentioned it a couple of nights ago when they had met up, and Lincoln had been sworn to secrecy. Clarke was going to bring the new man to the show, and if Anya knew Clarke at all it was going to piss her off. And a pissed off Clarke doesn't hold her tongue. Maybe a fight is what these two need. Really she's just doing them a favour. 

\----  
Lexa feels like shit, her head is pounding, her skin is sticky, and she reekes from sweating out the bottle of bourbon she drank all to herself last night. And Lincoln is late. She just wants to get rehearsal over with so she can sleep until the show. 

She just wants to not be in this city. She just wants to not think of Clarke. But that's kinda hard when she's fucked Clarke on every surface of this apartment. In the front foyer in that little hidden corner by the mail slots, and in the alley between the apartment building and the Chinese place next door.  
Her first date with Clarke had been at the coffee shop around the corner. And the bar down the street she used to work at is when she met her the first time. And the tattoo parlour that she and Clarke got matching seahorse tattoos at is three blocks over. And that time she punched that guy in the face after he grabbed Clarke’s ass on the street.  
Clarke walked her ass home and gave her shit all the way before she patched her up and made her forget all about the pain in her hand. Lexa had loved that girl all over this city.  
And Lexa just wants to leave. She likes touring. There's a girl in every city, she may not know all their names but she knows they've all got one thing in common, they don't have blond hair or blue eyes. 

Anya won't shut up about the dumb ass song she wrote a couple nights ago, wants her to play it. She knows what Anya thinks, that if she plays it, gets it out of her system, she'll get Clarke out of her system. Lexa is so hungover and she just wants Anya to shut up so she agrees. She'll play the song that demonstrates her stalkerish tendencies when it came to Clarke's new man. And she'll get a laugh out of everyone and maybe it'll work to help her get Clarke out of her system. 

\----  
8 months ago 

There's grumbling and shifting coming from the bed and then a sigh and all Clarke can do I chuckle as a hand comes to rest on her ribs nails digging a little, scratching a little, she has to fight the urge to stretch like a cat. 

“How long are you staying?” 

Clarke tries to keep the desperation out of her voice. She misses her girl, she misses waking up next to her and falling asleep with her. She misses pressing her butt back into Lexa’s lap when she wakes up just to feel Lexa start to stir and press her hands all over Clarke until she's awake enough to ring in the morning with her. She misses the morning coffee when even after a few orgasms and a cup Lexa is still a grump. 

“Hmmm, I have to be back in Boston tomorrow morning, I just came for the day.” 

Lexa grumbles her way through the sentence. Barely audible as she has her face buried in Clarke's neck. 

“When is this tour over again?” 

She tried. Clarke really tried to keep the sadness and desperation out of her voice. But she just can't and she breaks the morning spell they're under like Lexa’s been breaking her heart. 

Lexa groans and rolls out of bed. She's naked and there's a new tattoo on her side she hadn't seen before. And Clarke's angry because Lexa used to tell her everything and now all it seems they do is fight. 

“Why do you do this Clarke?” 

Lexa’s mad you can see it in the way she's clenching her jaw even though she doesn't raise her voice. 

“Why are you always gone!” Clarke lobbies one back never one to keep her voice down. 

Clarke was never one for keeping calm. 

This is why they used to be so good together. Lexa was ice. Always calm always steady. She's there when Clarke starts bar brawls and she's there when Clarke feels like she's burning because she has so much inside her. 

Lexa used to be there. 

Now she's gone all the time and doesn't tell her anything. 

“I'm not gonna sit here and be yelled at, Clarke. I'm sorry that the band is doing well. I'm sorry that my career means I'm gone a lot. But I came back to see you and all you want is a fight.” 

There's silence for a second before Lexa starts pulling on her clothes. 

“I might as well leave.” She whispers. 

And that's exactly what she does. Lexa walks out of the bedroom. Leaving Clarke crying on the bed. 

“No! No. You don't get to walk away again, I swear all I do in this relationship is watch you walk away! We have to talk, Lex!” 

Clarke is desperate. Just wants to be heard. Wants to not feel destroyed for one second. 

Getting up to follow Lexa she walks out to an empty apartment. Lexa already gone. 

\----  
Three days ago 

Lexa wakes up to a phone ringing. Groaning she turns over looking for her phone on the ground in her pants. 

“Hello?” 

Silence. There a hiccup on the other end of the line and Lexa knows immediately who it is. 

“Clarke what are you doing?”

She doesn't get a response just a sniffle. 

“Clarke are you okay? If you don't answer me I'm going to wake up anya and get her to call raven.” 

There's a snort. It's sad and angry. 

“Oh now you care.” 

Drunk. Clarke is absolutely hammered. She never slurs her words. She could drink anyone under the table and when she starts slurring you know she won't remember anything in the morning. 

“I always cared Clarke.” 

“Then why'd you leave.” 

“Because I was making you sad.” 

“Well I'm still sad.” 

It's your turn to snort. 

“What is Roan not cutting it for you.” 

Its cruel and she knows it. She has no right to be pissed about Clarke having a new relationship. Even if the guy is a tool. 

“Do you want to come over?” 

“No.” 

“You're such a bitch! What did I ever do to you?” 

Not for the first time Lexa wonders how they got here. 

“I may be a bitch but I'm not a cheater. You want to fix this? You want a quick fuck? You want to grab a drink and talk it out? Call me when you leave him.” 

Lexa hangs up before Clarke can say anything else. Wondering where the girl she fell in love with went. 

\----

Lexa hates the limelight when she's not performing but she loves the stage, loves the rush of having every eye in the room on her when she's got a song to sing and guitar in her hands. 

There's a lovely red head in the front row with an insane amount of curls that's been making eyes at her all night. Maybe she'll buy her a drink after the sets done. 

Lexa misses these shows. The ones in shitty bars and barely any room for anyone to move. When the heat of the crowd and the lights feels like it's pressing against you trying to crush you under its weight. It's electric. The band feeds off it makes for a hell of a show. 

Anya has to tune and Lincoln is taping out random sequences on the snare while Lexa guzzles water, striping the leather jacket. She's soaked through her shirt, the ink on her arms flashing in the lights because of the sweat. 

“Thanks for having us, it's been awhile since we've been back to New York and there's never quite anything like playing for that hometown crowd.” 

The bar rocks with screams and whistles. Lexa winks out into the crowd. Smirking and enjoying the rowdiness. 

“Okay okay so you know we're back home to work on the new record-” 

“Nice glasses!” 

A yell interrupts her from the crowd. Lexa chuckles. 

“Yeah yeah Anya and I are gonna have a talk about posting pictures I haven't approved” 

Lexa glares playfully over her shoulder at Anya. 

“I'm just giving the people what they want” 

Anya chirps. Lexa rolls her eyes. The crowd gets rowdier, and Lexa loves it. 

“Okay okay! So as I was saying, new stuff for the album!” 

Lexa has to pause and wait for the crowd to settle again. 

“So I know we're all tired of the ballads-” 

“I sure as fuck am!” Anya interrupts again. Lexa shakes her head.

“Which is why I'm excited to play you guys this one. It's a little ridiculous. But I'm sure we've all been there and if you haven't at least try to curb your judgement. I've been drunk for the majority of the last eight months so you can't blame me!” 

The crowd laughs. And Lexa winks again. And jumps right into the first chords. 

The lights drop, and the beat picks up, the crowd starting to bounce. 

“I heard he spent five hundred pounds on jeans  
Goes to the gym at least six times a week  
Wears boat shoes with no socks on his feet  
And I heard he's on a new diet and watches what he eats” 

The crowd screams, picking up on what she's singing about and Lexa feels good. Glad Anya made her play it. She's getting it off her chest and fuck it feels good. 

“I don't wanna know about your new man, cause if it was meant to be  
You wouldn't be calling me up trying to fuck  
Cause I'm positive that he don't wanna know about me”

\----

Clarke was regretting the decision to bring Roan with her tonight. When Raven had mentioned that they'd been invited to the band's last show of the tour she'd been apprehensive at first. And then she couldn't stop thinking about Lexa.  
Which was beyond frustrating. She's over her. It's been months. She was over Lexa. Except she clearly wasn't if that drunk call was anything to go by. She doesn't even remember making the call just waking up the next morning to a vague cryptic text from Lexa. 

“Why do you have to make everything so difficult” 

She had checked her call log and there it was 2am phone call to Lexa she didn't remember making. 

So she'd been pissed and wanted to prove that it didn't mean anything. And here she was, in a packed bar dancing on Roan while her ex girlfriend sings songs that used to be for her.

Clarke doesn't think Lexa knows she's here. She doesn't have that defeated look in her eye that she gets when she knows Clarke is around. So Clarke dances, drinks too much and watches the girl of her dreams sing and make eyes at the beautiful women in the front row, torturing herself with hope that maybe Lexa knows she's here and it's all just a game to get her attention. 

But then the end of the set comes and Lexa starts chatting about the new album and finally plays the song she's been chatting about.

It's loud and the beat hits her finally Lexa sings the first lyrics and all of Clarke's hopes go out the window. Because if Lexa knew that Clarke was going to be in that crowd then she never would have sang this song. 

Clarke is caught between rage and arousal. That half bitter half sexy voice is getting to her. 

“But still, I'm just keeping it real, still looking at your Instagram and I'll be creeping a little  
I'll be trying not to double tap, from way back, cause I know that's where the trouble's at  
Let me remind you of the days when you used to hold my hand  
And when we sipped champagne out of cider cans  
I guess if you were Lois Lane, I wasn't superman, just a young boy trying to be loved  
So let me give it to you”

 

The crowd loses it and starts clapping along to the beat. Clarke feels her stomach drop in time with the beat. Lexa is smirking into the microphone bouncing to the beat. 

“But enough about him, girl let's talk about you  
You were the type of girl that sat beside the water reading  
Eating a packet of crisps but you will never find you cheating  
Now you're eating kale, hitting the gym, keeping up with Kylie & Kim  
In the back of the club kissing a boy that ain't him”

Roans hands still on her waist and he leans down to whisper in her ear.

“Is this about you? About us?” 

The beat breaks and Lexa gets soulful. And Clarke starts pushing her way up to the stage. 

“Baby, I'm not trying to ruin your week  
But you act so differently  
When you're with him I know you're lonely  
Please, remember you're still free, to make the choice and leave  
And don't call me up you need to show me”

Clarke get to the front of the stage just as Lexa finishes the verse and opens her eyes. The smile on her face is brilliant and it falls away as soon as she meets familiar blue eyes in the crowd. 

\---  
One year and four months ago 

“I'm gonna marry you someday.”

They are drunk. So absolutely trashed on cheap wine. Sitting on the kitchen floor of Lexa's apartment, paint and pizza scattered in between clothes that had been tossed around carelessly. Clarke doesn't think she's ever been happier than in this moment. 

“Oh yeah? When's that going to be Miss Woods?”

“How about now Miss Griffin? If I asked you right now would you say yes?” 

Clarke smiles the biggest dopiest grin Lexa has ever seen and reaches for the discarded paint brush to her left. 

“Give me your hand.” 

Clarke grabs Lexa's left hand and dips the brush in black paint, and paints a band around Lexa's ring finger, and hands Lexa the paint brush and hold out her own left hand. 

“What do think?” 

“ I think there's no better way to marry you than naked, covered in paint, and stuffed with booze and pizza. You make life extraordinary Miss Griffin.” 

“That's Mrs Woods to you.”  
\----

Lexa walks off the stage after the final song. Anya follows behind watching the tension in Lexa’s shoulders. She practically hums with the tension. 

“You had no right.” 

It's quiet and Anya knows she's in trouble. Her little sister rarely gets quiet. She never yells, she never throws fits but when she gets quiet Anya knows she may have gone too far. 

“Come on lex, she would have eventually heard it. It's not that big a deal!” 

“You lied. I humiliated her.” 

Lexa finally turns to look at her. And the look in her eyes has Anya genuinely sorry. 

“You made me hurt her for no reason!” 

Lexa’s voice is starting rise. And Anya doesn't know what to do. 

“Why?! So you could toy with her. What were you trying to achieve!?” 

Anya finally regains her ability to speak. 

“I'm so sorry, Lexa. I didn't think it would be that bad! She's just been acting different and running around with that toolbox and I wanted both of you to open your eyes!” 

Lexa shakes her head. Anya can see the fight has left her. She just looks tired. 

“She has a right to do as she pleases Anya. I'm the one who left, I'm the one that stopped talking. I'm the one who made her miserable.” 

Anya can see the sadness in Lexa's eyes. 

“I wanted to be more for her but every time I tried I made it worst. So I left. And you just made me hurt her all over again.” 

“I'm sorry Lexa! I just thought, I thought maybe you were trying to say something. I just wanted to help.” 

Lexa shakes her head, exhausted. 

“I wrote this song because I wanted to prove to myself that she wasn't the girl I fell in love with anymore. She's different, and maybe just maybe if she was different I could let her go.” 

Anya comes forward and wraps Lexa in her arms squeezing her tight. Whispering in her ear. 

“I don't think you can let go of a love like that, Lex.” 

Lexa shakes her head. 

“I had to try.” 

\----

“Clarke! Let's just go! This doesn't have to be a thing, you're drunk and you know this isn't gonna end well.” 

Octavia is pleading. Clarke is on the warpath, she's furious. Roan had left by the time she'd gotten back to their table. He hadn't replied to any of her text so far. Clarke turns to Octavia whose being joined by Raven to try and calm her down. 

“One of you get you goddamn significant other and get me back stage.”

Both girls look at each other and then back at Clarke. 

“Let's go home.” Raven tries. 

“Now.” Clarke is done trying to negotiate. 

“I will get back there. So I either get us kicked out trying or you get Lincoln or Anya to let me back there.” 

“Griffin come on, let's just sleep on this. Lexa will be in town for the next couple months. Work it out when your sober.” 

“I swear to god Octavia. I will get us banned from this bar.” 

Octavia sighs. Resigned, pulls out her phone and texts Lincoln to come get them. 

They stand in silence listening to the crowd chattering about the song Lexa just sang. Speculation about whether or not the new album is gonna be that high tempo, if the ex girlfriend has heard the song yet, if it's actually true that Lexa spends her time instagram stalking when she could have any girl she wanted. When one girl says to another that Lexa hooked up with her friend after a New Orleans show, Clarke is about to turn around and start swinging, but Lincoln shows up out of breath. 

“Hey! Fuck. I'm so sorry Clarke!” He looks like a sad puppy and Clarke can't bring herself to be mad at him. 

“You couldn't have warned me, Lincoln!?” 

“I swear I don't think she would play it, she was drunk and wrote it a couple nights ago, then we rehearsed it a bit this morning but she didn't really seem like she'd play it.” 

Clarke is so angry. She's clenching her fists. And she's on the verge of tears. She's just so betrayed. 

“She didn't know I would be here did she?” 

“No I promised I wouldn't say anything.” 

“I want to see her, now Lincoln.” 

Lincoln nods and motions for them to follow him. When they make it back stage Anya is laying on a couch in a lounge area with her arm over her eyes.

Clarke walks by and grabs a vase full of water and cut flowers, and dumps it over Anya's face. Anya yelps and sits up sputtering and drenched 

“Asshole!” Clarke spits as she walks by towards the dressing room. 

“You get one Griffin!” Anya yells after her reaching for the towel Raven is holding out.

“I deserved that didn't I?” 

Raven nods her head and chuckles. 

\----

Lexa barely get a chance to react when the door to the change room is busted open so hard she thinks it's probably broken. 

“You arrogant, selfish, miserable, conniving asshole! How dare you. How dare you put me in a song and use my life as a joke!” 

“Clarke-” Lexa tries.

“No! For once in your life you're going to sit there and listen!” Tears are streaming down Clarke's cheeks. 

“You had no right! You left me, you walked out on me. You left when things got too hard. You let me be miserable and sad and did nothing to try and fix us.You made me feel like I wasn't good enough to be loved by you. And tonight. That song. You made me feel all those thing all over again. You made me feel cheap. Why would you do that to me. What did I ever do to you to make you hate me so much!?” 

Lexa sputters trying to find an answer. 

“I can't sit and read books anymore because when I try my mind just fills with you and I can't concentrate. And I don't paint anymore because all that I want to paint is you. And I started working out and watching trashy tv because because when I'm not busy my heart hurts so much I want to rip it out of my chest.” Clarke chokes out the words in between sobs. Lexa steps forward wants to hug her, touch her, something anything to offer compassion. 

“No. Don't touch me. You broke me Lexa. And you don't get to stand on a stage and tear down all the ways I've had to change just to survive the day.” 

“Clarke, please I'm sorry-” 

“Fuck you, Lexa.” 

\----

Two years and 3 months ago 

“Holy shit, O. Who is that talking to Lincoln?” 

Octavia cranes her neck around to see who Clarke is pointing too. 

“Ohh that's Lexa! She's the lead in the band Lincoln is in, she must be working tonight.” 

Clarke nods as Octavia starts talking about one of her judo students. 

“I'm going to go get a drink.” Clarke stands and walks away without waiting for a response. 

When she approaches the bar Lexa spots her and leans against her side of the bar waiting for the beautiful girl to order. 

“What can I get for you?” 

“Bourbon neat, please.” Lexa smirks at the order. Eyes never leaving Clarke's. 

“Coming right up, was that Octavia I saw you sitting with over there?” 

“Sure was, you're Lexa right. From Lincoln's band?”

Lexa hands over the drink, and refuses Clarke's money. 

“That's me, I didn't catch your name?”

“Clarke Griffin” Lexa nods seeming to contemplate something. 

“Well thanks for the drink Lexa. I should probably get back.” Clarke slides off the stool with her drink and starts to make her way back to her table. 

“Hey Clarke!” 

“Yeah?” 

“Do you like pancakes? Cause I know this dinner a few blocks east that's open 24 hours, wanna murder a stack with me after my shift?” 

Clarke smiles and Lexa thinks it's the most beautiful thing she's ever seen. 

“Yeah I'd love to” 

\----

It's a couple months before they run into each other. Both being diligent about avoiding the other. Clarke walks to the dinner at 4am because she can't sleep. Roan never returned her texts after that night. And last she checked he's moved on to a pretty dirty blond personal trainer. 

Clarke makes it to the table in the back corner by the window when she realizes someone is already sitting there.

“Ohh I'm sorry-” 

“Clarke!” 

“Just my luck.” Clarke mumbles to herself. She wants to leave. Wants to tell Lexa to go fuck herself and to get out of her dinner. She lives here more than Lexa does. She gets custody of the dinner. 

“Please sit?” Lexa is looking at Clarke with those eyes and Clarke sits. Because she's always been a sucker for those eyes, she hates herself in this moment. 

“How have you been?” Asks Lexa. 

“Honestly. Shit. How about you?” Lexa bites her lip and looks away. 

“Listen Clarke, I'm sorry. And I have something's I need to say to you, and I understand you may not want to hear them right now. So I'm going to leave. And when you want to hear me out call and I'll tell you everything. I really am sorry, Clarke.” 

Clarke lets her pack her things and grab her jacket before she says anything. 

“I wanna hear what you have to say.” Lexa sits back down so fast she almost misses the chair. 

“I need you to know that this is by no means an excuse. I just want to try and explain.” 

Clarke nods. Waiting for Lexa to continue. 

“I wrote that song the night after you called me. I was angry and drunk and desperate to make you seem so far away from the girl I loved. So that I could try and forget you. I was never going to play it. At least that's what I thought until Anya kept bugging me to play it. So I gave in. I never should have let her talk me into it. I was mad and hurt that you were moving on and wanted to make you hurt. I was selfish and didn't want to see you happy with someone else. Which is horrible of me because I remember the days when i would have done anything to see you happy. And then I wasn't making you happy anymore and so I stopped coming home when I could and made excuses and pretended there was nothing wrong. I walked away and made you carry the weight of our failing relationship and I'm sorry. If i hadn't been so steadfast in ignoring the problem we might not even be in this position.” 

Lexa finally looks up at Clarke, and sees nothing. Clarke wears a blank face and Lexa decides she's too late. She pushed and pushed and Clarke has had enough. 

“Thank you for hearing me out, Clarke. I know you didn't have to. You've always selflessly put everyone around you before yourself that's why I lov- that's why you're you.” 

Lexa gets up grabs her things, leaves a few bills on the table and sends one last look at Clarke as she walks out the dinner. She doesn't let the tears fall until she's half way back to her apartment. 

Her phone starts ringing just as she hits the the bottom step to her apartment building. 

“Hello?”

“Do you like pancakes? Cause I know this dinner that's open 24 hours. Wanna murder a stack with me sometime?”


End file.
